Losing a friend, family member, or acquaintance is hard. We often find ourselves at our wit’s end, thinking about all the things we could’ve said, all the things we could’ve done. Only if we knew!
Delivering a eulogy is an opportunity to put those feelings into words and to celebrate the life of the deceased. Eulogies are a crucial part of any funeral service. It’s like a tribute bordering on reminiscence.
Most people associate eulogies with something of a type of closure they need to heal from the gaping hole left by their loved ones’ sudden demise.
Just like everything else, there is a right and a wrong way of delivering eulogies. The right one helps you meaningfully sum up a person’s life through carefully chosen words, anecdotes, or stories.
A Step-By-Step Guide on Giving a Eulogy
Lantern teaches how to give a Eulogy by employing these basic tips and tricks.
Write it Down
A eulogy is a tribute to the dead. It’s an important act of service/friendship that commemorates the end of a healthy, fostering relationship. It is thus important to give it the thought and attention it deserves.
When you write a eulogy, make sure you’re writing from your heart — anything less would taint the real relationship you had with the person.
Depending on your relationship with the deceased, getting through the eulogy can be a difficult thing. It can help to practice the speech beforehand, whether alone or with a friend. It’s a weighing but important factor in the funeral service, so take all the help you can get to get you through it.
A eulogy is all about the impact the person has left on their survivors and is usually filled with stories and anecdotes shared between the two of you.
Use inside jokes and stories where the deceased persons’ compassion, love, and other traits are highlighted. If you’re writing a eulogy for a deceased friend, a good practice is to run it through their family members to check whether they’re okay with what you would like to talk about.
Leave vagueness out of the door when delivering a eulogy. Focus on specific days, events, or occasions. Remember, don’t talk about anything your friend wouldn’t want out in the open. Even if it’s meant to lighten the somber mood.
Give Free Rein to Your Emotions
Funerals are hard. Everybody knows and understands how losing a person can impact the best of us. You don’t have to condition yourself to appear stoic and composed.
Don’t be afraid to cry. Isn’t that what usually accompanies grief? Those in the audience will understand you’re doing your best to honor the deceased and empathize with you.
On the same note, don’t hesitate to laugh when you’re telling a story about all the fun times you had. You can both grieve and fondly remember a person at their prime time.
Do not berate yourself for having a wide range of emotions to account for how you feel about the sudden death of a beloved person.
If anything, funny anecdotes and stories lighten the mood of the funeral service and show how deeply and fully the person lived and how they impacted another individual’s life in their own little way.
Say Your Goodbyes
This is probably the most emotional part. Saying goodbyes are hard but it’s an important step you need to do for closure.
Dealing with the sudden absence of a person from our lives is not easy. A eulogy can help you come to terms with it. Wouldn’t you want to end your earthly connection with a friend or a loved one on your terms?
The above guide can help you frame your eulogy in a better way. Remember to keep it brief and appropriate, and share some meaningful memories to remember your loved one by.